Open Letter...

It's been just hours since we parted and I missed you long ago. It seems I've opened up and my heart let a flood of emotions in. I can't hide the smile I carry on my face or the look I get in my eyes when I see you. A look of joy, of hunger, of calm, of this wanting need to grab you in my arms and pull you close. I've known you and now I know only more of who I love. It's not easy going to bed at night without saying goodnight when I want to. It's not easy sharing but I'm alright when you say your heart is mine, your lips mine, your mind infatuated with me. It's not easy but I can't stop loving you more each day. I realize how much you mean because every moment I'm away from you only makes me want to be with you more. Whether we sit in silence and talk, as we often have in my room, or sit by music and not say a thing, I am at ease and comfortable. Not once have I thought to actually turn a tv on with you because our time together goes by so fast already nothing is needed to fill space. I feel I can open myself up and share my emotions with you only I'm not much of a talker or never thought myself to be. I'm a good listener and maybe this is where we meet. There are many places we meet and many signs I should've taken by now to walk but here I am. I feel more and more that my whole heart is yours but I'm not ready to completely set it free to you. However much like riding a bike so much of this can be there is a huge part of new territory for me. Boundaries, I know there are supposed to be some but where they are at a given point varies. The anticipation of being able to hold your naked body to mine builds up. All I want is to feel you close, be engulfed in your arms, and know that we don't have to watch the clock. With you I am stuck. My heart races writing this. It seems my heart opened and without searching there you were, like a present waiting to be opened. Not often can I tell someone when our first kiss was but I know ours from weeks of wanting to take your lips between mine. It's been days of kissing now and all I said has proven true, you can't handle kissing me. I fee you pull away as soon as it gets heated up if you last that long. I never warned you because of the circumstances but you were warned after, you'll fall in love. When your heart is here what do you do there? The one problem is knowing that we can love each other but never be together... or is that one of my attractions to you? And me you, my solitude and contentness alone that I don't need more or want it. We see each as safe perhaps but how safe are our hearts once they are each others? I'm falling further in love with you and only see it getting stronger. I thank you for every day I am with you not just physically but emotionally. You bring out every emotion in me yet I have a clear enough head when the warning bells go off to stop and breathe and not make the mistakes I made before by looking at things rationally. Something special has grown and blossomed here and like anything else that's beautiful.... It just makes your heart, Smile. My love.